Part II of the Circle of Advisors, One of an Ongoing Series of Essays on "Things Important to Every Lawyer"

Part I: Considering Drake

Part II: The Circle of Advisors Compared and Contrasted to Various Imposter Groups

How can you distinguish the circle of advisors from the many imposter groups for which it is so often mistaken? The answer to that important question is the subject of the final part of this essay.

There are four groups that commonly masquerade as a circle of advisors: The gaggle of yes-men, the group of drinking buddies, the posse, and the entourage. To illustrate the strengths and weaknesses of each, we’ll consider a lawyer I’ll call Bert. Like many lawyers, Bert has been called upon to make an important, life-altering decision while out of town in Las Vegas. His dilemma is this: It’s time to return to Minneapolis, but he’s down more than $15,000. Given another day of hard gambling, Bert could easily recoup these losses. But if he sticks around, he’ll miss the baptism of his niece. He's been asked to be the godfather. Should Bert stay an extra day?

To answer that question, let’s imagine Bert turns for advice to each of the four imposter groups.

The Gaggle of Yes-Men. Every lawyer with at least five years of experience has a gaggle of yes-men upon whom he can depend for a variety of tasks. Generally, these yes-men are called “associates.” While some lawyers treat their yes-men kindly, none would haul them all the way to Las Vegas. Not only would this be a waste of money, but the yes-men are required to stay behind to explain the absence of their boss. As advisors, the gaggle of yes-men is useless. Rather than exercising independent judgment, the gaggle of yes-men merely figures out what the boss wants in his moment of greatest weakness and then answers accordingly. In response to Bert’s dilemma, the gaggle of yes-men wouldn't help at all.

The Group of Drinking Buddies. In the first part of this essay, the group of drinking buddies was exposed for what it is: a roving band of lunatics looking for any opportunity to ridicule the first member of the group who seems in need of ridiculing. Although plenty of fun in the abstract, the group of drinking buddies doesn’t care about giving good advice. If asked to consider whether Bert should remain in Las Vegas another day, the group of drinking buddies would order another round so that they could think it over. They’d continue to do this until Bert had missed his plane, and then they’d all start laughing. Again, no help.

The Posse. While the group of drinking buddies is generally scattered and diffuse, lacking a central leader, the posse forms itself into a tightly-knit unit that revolves around the lawyer like spokes around a hub. The posse’s chief attribute is its loyalty. A lawyer can count on his posse to clean out his gutters, collect his overdue debts, or follow him around all night as he searches for his soulmate. In return, the posse expects only a reasonable weekly stipend and several extravagant gifts at Christmas. Since as a group the posse is no more intelligent than a roomful of weightlifters, the posse cannot be counted on for advice. If asked whether Bert should stay in Las Vegas another day, the posse is very likely to respond, “Huh?” This, of course, is unacceptable.

The Entourage. Only the most flashy, extravagant lawyers have an entourage. Even those who are rightfully entitled to an entourage often balk at the opportunity, citing the likelihood that their entourage might get them into more trouble than they’re in already. It's not hard to understand why this might happen. The entourage is known for its embarrassingly vulgar tastes, often demanding unnecessary extras such as cocaine, prostitutes, and tickets to “the fight.” Although some lawyers rely on an entourage to ward off feelings of loneliness and despair, asking the entourage for advice would be insane.

This short field guide to imposter groups should help lawyers identify those qualities that are most desirable in a circle of advisors. The circle of advisors should be loyal to the lawyer while demanding nothing in return. Each member should be intelligent and filled with empathy. When necessary, and as explained in the first part of this essay, the circle of advisors should be willing to tell the lawyer precisely the opposite of what he wants to hear.

Let’s consider Bert again. If Bert were to ask his circle of advisors whether he should stick around in Las Vegas for another day, they would certainly tell him no. In fact, if they had any say in the matter, Bert would have returned to Minneapolis at least fourteen days ago.

It's a litmus test for a circle of advisors. Try it on your own, and see if they pass the test.

Related Post: A Consideration of the Lawyer's Briefcase, Another in the Ongoing Series of Essays on "Things Important to Every Lawyer"

Comments

[David Giacalone]

Two questions for the potential advisee:

(1) why would any wise person join the Circle of Advisors? [wiseguy, I understand]

(2) there seems to be an awful lot of testosterone in the imposter groups; since lawyers and men are the only politically-correct subject for derision these days, aren't you piling on?

p.s. Do posse members really say "Huh?"

[Evan]

David: As to point 2, I was worried about this, and originally had a sentence promising a more gender-inclusive portrayal of imposter groups sometime in the future. Then I changed my mind and edited it out. You are more than welcome to work on it yourself.