Sorry to wake you. I know you're in Philadelphia this morning for the MDL hearing, probably staying in these luxurious accommodations (which are more or less comparable, now that I think about it, to the luxury of a federal courthouse). It's been two months since I collected all my missives to you in a single post. Perhaps you thought I'd forgotten about my quest to convince you to hold one of your every-two-month hearings in East St. Louis, Illinois. Unfortunately for you, I haven't.
Will you promise to spend a little time thinking about me today when you convene at 9:30 a.m. at the James A. Byrne United States Courthouse at 601 Market Street? I learned all the details from your notice of hearing (pdf). Believe me, I'm sorry I couldn't make it. Not only would I have been able to confront you face to face, but I could have learned more about some of the important cases that are on the docket, for example, the Accutane Products Liability Litigation, the Pineapple Antitrust Litigation, the High Sulfur Content Gasoline Products Liability Litigation, and so much more (pdf again).
Obviously, you'll be much too busy to think about my request for you to come to East St. Louis. Don't worry about it, though--you probably wouldn't agree with me anyway. After all, you're in Philadelphia. Why would you want to be in East St. Louis?
I guess I'm going to have to come up with some other way to get you to come. Maybe a barbecue at my house following the hearing? Did I tell you I have the new Nelly CDs? And a basketball hoop in the driveway? Think about it.