As I rush to finish a brief that's due tomorrow, I've fallen a little behind in my Legal Underground production schedule. But dashing off a post about derogatory names for lawyers won't take any time at all. In fact, I can simply copy from A Dictionary of Modern Legal Usage, where Bryan Garner has already assembled quite a long list. Here's a selection:
Ambulance Chaser. A lawyer who solicits business from accident victims at the scene of an accident or shortly thereafter; by extension, an unscrupulous plaintiffs' lawyer.
Blackstone Lawyer. A self-educated antebellum lawyer whose legal training consisted primarily in reading Blackstone's Commentaries. Thomas Jefferson complained that "a student finds there a smattering of everything, and his indolence easily persuades him that if he understands that book, he is a master of the whole body of law."
Country Lawyer. A rural lawyer. This term can carry positive connotations, but it sometimes suggests modest intellectual abilities.
Latrine Lawyer. A lawyer who gets business from the rumors spread in the latrine.
Philadelphia Lawyer. An ultracompetent lawyer who knows the ins and outs of legal technicalities; also, a shrewdly unscrupulous lawyer.
Again, please note: the indented portion of this post is a direct quote from Garner's book. If you want to complain, complain to him. If you want to suggest your own derogatory terms for lawyers, that's what the comments are for. But please, play fair, and try not to mention any real lawyers by name.
Update: Here's "Derogatory Names for Lawyers, Part Two."
Note: If you are a fan of derogatory names for lawyers, then you'll love my book How to Feed a Lawyer (and Other Irreverent Observations from the Legal Underground), available at Amazon.