You’ve known him all your life. He’s boorish, self-centered, and arrogant. He’s petty and vain. And greedy. And what a loudmouth! Always gesturing with those long fingers--which are very smooth, by the way. He’s the only man you know with a French manicure.
This weekend, you’re supposed to see him at a party. You wish you didn’t have to. You already know what he’s going to be talking about: his new BMW, or his gold watch, or his jet lease. Or maybe his plans for an upcoming winter vacation, when he’ll be taking the entire family, including an ex-wife, skiing in Vancouver. It’s certainly a discussion you could do without!
That’s why you plan to keep your distance. It’ll be easy to do, too, since you’ll recognize him the moment he enters the room. You’ve seen him on TV, after all. And you’ve read about him in the newspapers, and in magazines, and in the fiction of John Grisham.
But will he even show up at the party? Now that you think about it, every time you expect to see the Stereotypical Lawyer, he’s nowhere to be found. It’s a mystery to which you have no answer. It’s like . . . it’s like he doesn’t exist at all! But how could that be possible?
You’re not sure. You’re stumped. But this doesn’t surprise you much: after all, you always have been sort of an addle-headed moron.
3. The "Types of Lawyers" Category--all "types of lawyers" posts