From the Department of "All Publicity Is Good Publicity"

Are you a man who's having trouble understanding women? I know the answer to your problem. Repeat after me: She is not your friend.

That's what I learned from Seattle family-law lawyer J. Michael Gallagher, who has written a book about the topic that's available on his website for only $15.95. It's titled She Is Not Your Friend: A Man's Guide to Understanding Women. Now do you understand?

Just the title of the book made me look at Andrea (my wife and law partner) in a completely different light. So I've moved out with nothing but the laptop on which I'm writing this post. If this split-up turns out to be a bad idea, I'm holding Attorney Gallagher accountable. But I'm peanuts compared to Gallagher's real problem: just the other day, he was labeled a "bad example" by a Professional Responsibility professor as well as his entire class!

I read about it at Legal Quandary, who has the scoop--

It appears that NOT ONLY does Mr. Fabulous Attorney advertise, he ALSO runs a website. A website that was prominently featured in today's Professional Responsibility class. And you know that old saying "if you can't be a good role model, you can at least serve as a bad example"? Yeah, that's totally what our class discussion focused on because this guy's website looks like a how-to guide on walking the fine line of the Model Rules.

And at Will Work for Favorable Dicta, Energy Spatula is also taking Attorney Gallagher to task for a recent television commercial called "Gallagher's Gals" that's also available at his website. It features three "legal assistants" in prom dresses who do their best sirens-of-Greek-mythology impersonation in an attempt to lure male patrons to Gallagher's law firm.

Watch the commercial yourself and see what you think. Since the three "legal assistants" are all women, I'm reasonably certain I shouldn't trust them. On the other hand, I'm awfully lonely without Andrea and they sure are pretty. Which brings me to another question. I've traveled all the way to Seattle to get a closer look, but I've only been here once before. Can someone tell me how to get to Michael Gallagher's office at 300 Vine?

(Concluding note to Legal Quandary and Energy Spatula: While it's possible that you two could both point me in the right direction, I don't think I can trust you either. Thanks for your posts though. If you insist on pinning me down about what I really think about Mr. Gallagher and his website, sorry. You'll have to ask David Giacalone.)

Comments

[Rufus]

You know you're going to get a cease and desist letter from that scumba -- er, uh, fine member of the family law bar.

P.S. I like the girl in the middle with the speech impediment.

[Dave!]

I think Mr. J. Michael Gallagher could solve the problem of his apparent contradictions with a simple disclaimer at the bottom of his TV ad: "Warning: the models depicted in this commercial are not your friend."

Sadly, I'll bet he not only gets clients from the ad, I'll bet he sells copies of that book.

[David Giacalone]

Evan, I haven't had my second cup of caffeine yet today, so that might be why I can't figure out what I'm suppose to tell your readers, should they seek my input. I thought you really liked groovy audio and video websites, prom dresses, innovative marketing, etc.

I definitely can't help you with Andrea. Here's a one-line haiku from W.F. Owen that seems relevant:

another argument unfolds the futon

[Dylan]

Maybe it's the blurry low-res nature of the ad, but as far I can tell only the one on the right is actually cute. I guess things are different under the great raincloud.

[Legal Quandary]

A quick Lexis search reveals that the esteemed Mr. Gallagher is a graduate of the University of Puget Sound. (Now defunct and merged into Seattle University). Undergrad at Washington & Lee.

Not that I expect you to trust me.

[coyotelaw]

Just gotta get me one of those fine $30 t-shirts! Green embroidery! On black!

[Anon]

The best was that last line, "If you're our client, we'll take care of you," followed by a wink. Tasteless. I agree with Dylan that the one on the right is the only hot one. But, man, she looks good!

[the dark goddess of replevin]

Now, really. J. Michael is one of our local treasures.

He used to use a business card--I don't know if he still does--depicting a man holding up a sword and a severed head with flowing locks, plus the logo "There can only be one." (You know, the Highlander movies).

I am not making this up. I have seen the card. And the last time I was up against him in court, I whupped his ass.

[Abnu]

It would have been interesting to see the look on his face when you handed him his head on a plate, and gave him your business card.

The Dark Goddess of Replevin - She is not your friend.

[S]

Im the girl in the middle

[Anon]

He's at it again - "Gallagher's Gals - Part Deux."