THE STANKOWSKI REPORT #15: In Which Things Move Forward Inch by Inch at One Big Firm, Post-Katrina

by Stan Stankowski

First and foremost, my deep condolences to all of those in New Orleans and on the Mississippi and Alabama Gulf Coasts. I am very pleased that Ernie the Attorney and his family are doing well in Lafayette. I cannot, borrowing the sentiments of Ernie, begin to imagine what the impact of this will be. However, this is a good example of how things work in some modern day law firms, in the most disfavored of legal jargon, to wit:

Partner: Stankowski!
Stankowski: What can I do for you?
Partner: This is Fred.
Stankowski: <mildly bemused, but thinking nothing of it, after all, you meet people all of the time, and really, no one remembers your name>
Partner: Fred is in our branch in New Orleans. He grew up there.
Stankowski: Wow. I am really sorry. Is your family ok?
Fred: Not really.
Stankowski: Man, I am so sorry, what can I do to--
Partner: What you can do is help Fred out. He is a third year and needs to get those hours in. Clients in the Big Easy! Storms come and go but business is steady. So Fred needs to share your assistant and your office for a little while. We have him a laptop, so he won’t need a whole desk.
Fred: <shrug>
Stankowski: Oh, okay, no problem.
Partner: Get on in there Fred! Nothing like a few good billable hours to get your mind off of things, am I right?
Fred: Oh, ummm, yeah….
Partner: I mean, when my wife left me and took our two kids, the best therapy I had was a little time at the office. Good thing really, I wouldn’t have made partner otherwise.  See! You can take advantage of this time, Fred! No real distractions, new city . . . time to focus on work!
Fred:  That may be just what I need. <glum look>
Partner: Of course it is.  Just let Stan know what you need!

[Partner leaves]

Stan: I am so sorry.
Fred: Yeah, this isn’t any good. My parents’ retirement home is gone. My house would be all right, but, I mean, is anything down there going to be all right?  Good Lord.
Stan: I am so sorry. I cannot imagine.
Fred: Well, at least we got out ok.
Stan: Absolutely. That is very lucky.
Fred: The only client I have brought in is completely wiped out. I called him to see if we needed to file suit against his insurance company, and he said he was just going to give it up. That was at least $200,000 a year in business.
Stan: Oh shit.
Fred: Yeah.
Stan: But your kid is ok? And your wife?
Fred: Yeah, I guess, for now.
Stan: Yeah.
Fred. I need a drink.
Stan: I’m buying. Let’s go.

About the Author: Stan Stankowski is the pseudonym of a first-year associate working in a litigation firm somewhere in the South. For more details, read his introductory post, as well as Evan Schaeffer's introduction. The collected Stankowski Reports are here.

Comments

[Anon]

Well done Stan. I like your posts, and find your detractors overzealous.

[Starqueen]

As always, another great post. The highlight of my week.
Love, your wife

[Eh Nonymous]

Wow! There's a Mrs. Stan?

That amazing revelation aside,

Stan: thank you for this post. It's been the most human and humane left. Buy Fred a drink for me, and I'll buy you one should we ever meet.

As always, thoughts and prayers are with the survivors and the homeless and the injured.

To momentarily hijack the comment thread, has everyone read about the horrific disaster on the Tigris that happened at about the same time? Northwards of 600 people crushed, drowned, or suffocated when a massive crowd of pilgrims were panicked by rumors of a man wearing a suicide bomb belt? It was a gigantic loss of life, larger at the time than the reported toll from Katrina, although presumably with less property damage. As if property and the hit our economy could take compares with the loss of human life, even if it is in the Middle East, in an arab country, in Iraq.

My thoughts, again, go to the survivors, the injured, and those who have lost others.

[Eh Nonymous]

"left"? Why did I write "left"? I mean "yet." Weird.

[Yeoman]

Wow. I hope Stan's story is a huge exaggeration. If not, the partner in this story is a brainless twit. Somebody ought to slap him.

[mythago _]

I have heard that law is one of the few professions where certain mental disorders (narcissism, sociopathic personality) are actually assets to advancement, and this seems to provide evidence for that theory.