The Legal Underground

A Tip from the Machiavellian Lawyer

The Machiavellian Lawyer once said:

Can a kernel of wisdom be found in even the most trite of trite expressions? Consider this favorite of the trial lawyers: Pigs get fat, hogs get slaughtered. For many lawyers, this single line contains everything they think they need to know about the fine art of settlement negotiations. By making use of this expression, they attempt to measure the reasonableness of a suggested compromise not by the more complex standards of the strategically gifted, but with the simple expedient of measuring their own internal feelings of greed. For them, the right time to settle is the point at which they begin to feel less like a pig and more like a hog. You can do better than this. If your co-counsel uses this expression, remember that not only is he less self-aware than he believes he is, but his ability to assess greed by any rational standards is open to debate. While greed for some means a nicer car, greed for others means a larger yacht or a second jet. When you hear this expression being used, ask yourself about the person using it. Is it a lawyer who is just a pig? Or is it a hog who smugly believes he's just a pig? When working with co-counsel, always beware of hogs in pigs' clothing, for they may be your undoing.

A Tip from the Machiavellian Lawyer

The Machiavellian Lawyer once said:

The human animal is weak and prone to self-doubt. As a result, it craves both praise and attention. Lawyers are no different in this regard. The wisest among them, however, rise above this weakness and use it to their advantage by learning the art of flattery.

By its nature, flattery is insincere. The flatterer compliments his opponent on a bold move not because he is truly impressed, but because the flattery will put his opponent into the position of owing something to the flatterer. By means of the flattery, the opponent is reduced to the role of a debtor. The flatterer memorizes names not because he wants to be friends with his opponents, but so that he can make them think he would be friends if given the opportunity.

The flatterer who can march into a crowded courtroom for a docket call, smile at each lawyer personally, and greet them all by name--that's the lawyer who's using flattery as a way to get ahead.

A Tip from the Machiavellian Lawyer

The Machiavellian Lawyer once said:

Within a large law firm, information does not travel from the top down to the lower ranks. Rather, it travels from the top sideways to the staff, due to leaks that occur when lawyers at all levels of the firm share information with their secretaries. This is why in a large law firm, it is always among the staff that you will find the best information about the goings-on within the firm, sometimes equal or superior even to the firm’s executive management committee.

Never neglect or alienate any member of the law-firm staff. Instead, use the staff to make you powerful. Find a way to channel into their network of information. Befriend a staff member you can trust and make him or her your mole. Use your mole not only to collect information, but also to start rumors that will help your cause.

A Tip from the Machiavellian Lawyer

The Machiavellian Lawyer once said:

When admiring another’s material possessions, people rarely wonder how much is owed to the bank. Rather than being equated with debt, material possessions are equated with success. For this reason, every lawyer who wants to be successful should buy an expensive car. It doesn’t matter whether he can afford it. Success will come to those who are perceived to be successful.

A Tip from the Machiavellian Lawyer

The Machiavellian Lawyer once said:

To excel in a law firm, make yourself indispensable. Start by identifying a type of knowledge within the firm that is highly-valued but in short supply. Exploit this shortage by making yourself an expert. Then leverage the value of your new knowledge by becoming involved in as many projects as possible.

After you have become an expert, think twice before teaching your skills to others. If you share your knowledge too freely, you will devalue the currency that has made you rich. When called upon to instruct others, learn the secret known to every Italian cook: share your recipe willingly, but omit a minor, yet important, ingredient. The cook’s students will be able to replicate the dish but will never be able to duplicate it. The cook will remain the master.

A Tip from the Machiavellian Lawyer

The Machiavellian Lawyer once said:

It is commonly thought that lawyers should be “civil” with one another, meaning they should concede ground to their opponents merely because as lawyers, they're all secretly in league with one another.

In a typical scenario, a lawyer will receive a call from his opponent asking for an “extension of time” a few weeks before an important brief is due. A sense of professional courtesy will prevent the first lawyer from asking the second why the extension is needed.  But if asked, the second lawyer will freely admit the truth: The extension is needed because he is taking a much-needed ski vacation to the Rocky Mountains, his third this year.

It will remind the first lawyer that he too is much in need of a ski vacation.  So like a buffoon, he will accede to the request without further inquiry.  After all, isn’t he likely to need an extension himself very soon?

The wise lawyer knows the value of a good horse trade. When the opposing lawyer asks for a favor, the wise lawyer will reflexively answer no. This will evoke panic in his opponent and increase the wise lawyer’s bargaining position. After some time has passed, the wise lawyer will “reconsider” his position but ask for something concrete in return. He might ask his opponent to answer the discovery requests to which his opponent just filed lengthy and baseless objections. He might ask his opponent to agree to an amended pleading without having to seek leave of court. He might ask his opponent to stipulate to the admissibility of the plaintiff’s medical records at trial.

Remember it well: Only fools engage in lawyerly “civility” without being sure to get something in return.

A Tip from the Machiavellian Lawyer

The Machiavellian Lawyer once said:

The most powerful lawyer at the firm is the one who knows where the bodies are buried. To rise to the top of your firm, operate as a confidant. Learn how to persuade others to confide in you. Begin collecting secrets and watch how powerful you become.

Others won't confide in you, however, unless you confide in them. When it is your turn to share a secret, always be on your guard. Divulge something about yourself that you would be proud for others to know. Talk about the psychological burden of being an overachiever. Divulge the shame you felt when your classmates mocked you for graduating first in your class. Share the embarrassment of knowing how to speak English, French, and German but not Portuguese.

In this way, you will be playing the confidence game without giving away any real nuggets of your own authority. If you're ever revealed as one who bargains with fool's gold, it won't matter: you'll already be on your way to owning the entire mine.

A Tip from the Machiavellian Lawyer

The Machiavellian Lawyer once said:

Know the value of your own work product.  Never part with something you have created as a lawyer without making a copy of it first for yourself.  If you make this your habit, you will come to possess the keys to your own freedom in the guise of a "form file." 

Do not stop with your own work product.  Whenever something that will be useful to you later crosses your desk, make a copy for your files.  These should never be stored in your office but should be maintained in some other safe place.  Otherwise, you will find that someone more powerful than you will be prepared to claim an ownership interest in your files just when you are most in need of them.

By maintaining possession elsewhere, you will moot other claims to ownership.  This strategy will insure that when you decide to part with the firm, you will be able to leave with the information you have so carefully collected, which will smooth your transition from employee to free agent in your chosen specialty of the law.

A Tip from the Machiavellian Lawyer

The Machiavellian Lawyer once said:

To win at litigation, you must always stay on the offensive. If you represent the plaintiff, obtain a trial date early in the case and move forward as if it is set in stone. Don’t wait for your opponent’s discovery requests before filing your own. Spend your time filing motions, rather than responding to motions. Never hesitate to take depositions at your first opportunity.

As the master of the litigation schedule, you will be feared, not ignored. As the one who sets the agenda, you will be in a position to control the timing of a settlement. But never mention settlement yourself; instead, always assume your case is going to trial. Never grasp at a settlement lest you grasp at straws.

A Tip from the Machiavellian Lawyer

The Machiavellian Lawyer once said:

When appearing for a motion hearing, the lawyer who filed the motion is permitted to speak first. This is an unwritten rule of courtesy among lawyers. It is also a rule you should always strive to break.

As you approach the judge, your opponent will be nervous and apprehensive, no matter what his or her level of experience. Never wait for him to speak first. Instead, introduce yourself to the judge, even if he is well known to you, and state which side you represent. Next, introduce your opponent. Finally, tell the judge which motions are set in the case for the day.

In conducting your introduction, you will appear so pleasant, so helpful, so polite, that your opponent will never even consider interrupting you. Meanwhile, as you explain the day’s motions to the judge, you should characterize them in a way that puts your own position in a favorable light. You can do this by carefully choosing your words or through subtle cues such as your tone of voice and facial expressions. In this way, you can seize the high ground even before the argument has begun.