How to Feed a Lawyer (and Other Irreverent Observations from the Legal Underground)

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David Giacalone

Mr. Schaeffer, Bard Counsel does not normally work on weekends, but you have pointed to an emergency haiku situation meriting the expenditure of overtime pay. The following reponse has been sent to Ms. Bekah at Mixtape Marathon:

Dear Bekah,

In response to an inquiry from Lawyer-Author Evan Schaeffer, the Bard Counsel has reviewed your MPRE haiku posting.

We are usually pleased when more people are exposed to haiku and never want to discourage haiku appreciation. However, we fear that you did not research the concept before starting this exercise (in MPRE terms, a lack of diligence causing a lack of competence), resulting in a collection of poetry that has very little connection with either the tradition or the current state of haiku. This has caused a misleading lack of candor to the forum and perpetuated the lay misconception that haiku must have 17 syllables and that anything written in three lines of 5-7-5 syllables is haiku -- thus violating your fiduciary duties to your readers. (cont.)

Rather than suspend your poetic license, the Bard Discipline Commission shall require that you read M.D. Welch's 10 Tips for Writing Haiku and dagosan's intro to haiku, and then submit a brief essay explaining why one or two of your efforts might be haiku, but the other "poems" are not.

A quick perusal of your other work product suggests that you will be back in good-standing with the haiku community very soon.

In the future, please present your inquiries with more specificity.

Associate Bard Counsel

Prof. Yabut

Giacalone is off on some haiku crusade. It is the consensus of ethicalEsq and myself that making light of aspects of the organizational or educational institutions of the legal profession is always appropriate, even if ethics are involved, so long as the interests of clients and the justice system come first in the practice of law.


Comments from not one, but two of Mr. Giacalone's personalities. Not bad for a Sunday!

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