How to Feed a Lawyer (and Other Irreverent Observations from the Legal Underground)

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Stan, I have worked in the legal industry for ten years and this is some funny sh*t! Keep writing I am fan!


I agree 100% with your comment regarding Chicago attorneys.


Take your Chicago-hatin' and shove it.


Spoken like a true Chicago lawyer! Only in my experience, the abuse usually comes in the form of a six-page letter with lots of parts and subparts and a conclusion that threatens a motion for sanctions and a bar complaint if I even think about filing that motion for leave to file an amended complaint I had mentioned the previous week at a deposition--by which time I'm quite baffled, so I get on the phone and call the lawyer, and he's like, "Oh, hi! Good to hear from you!"--as if he'd never written that nasty letter in the first place. It happens to me like that all the time with lawyers from Chicago. When I asked someone who used to practice in Chicago about it, he said it's the preferred method of working up a case in the Long-Winded City--lots of wordy letters threatening sanctions and bar complaints. He didn't have any other explanation.

So is that really how Chicago lawyers work up cases? Or does it just seem like that to me because I'm based around St. Louis and some of that Cards-Cubs rivalry sometimes bleeds into the litigation?


I work in the Quad Cities, about 3 hours from Chicago. I was shocked a couple years ago when I had a products liability case with an associate from Lord, Bissell on the other side. The guy was a complete gentleman through the whole thing. Not at all what I was expecting. Moral of the story: Not everyone in Chicago is an ass.


I can think of a couple of civilized lawyers in Chicago. I can also think of some not-so-civilized ones too.

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