CRIMINALS READING THIS WEBLOG, PLEASE CHECK IN . . . Back in the old days, I used to report ahead of time on Legal Underground about when I'd be going out of town. Not only did this give a sense of immediacy to the weblog, but it gave me a chance to meet some interesting people for breakfast or lunch. (Readers and webloggers who emailed after reading about a trip, that is.)
At some point, however, my wife Andrea, who is apparently suspicious of people who read weblogs, said I had to stop announcing when I'd be out of town. She said that to do so would leave the family alone in the house at the mercy of the next Legal Underground reader who also happens to be a burglar hoping for an easy score.
I can't say I have the same concerns. On the other hand, I'm not the one who's left at home alone.
Silly, or not?
Anyway, as a bit of market research, I'd appreciate it if any criminals who are reading this weblog would please identify themselves in the comments. At least then we can get a handle on how many of you there are.
I guess the answer depends on wheter you're one of those types who believes that all lawyers are crooks.
Posted by: U.A. | May 25, 2006 at 11:55 AM
Evan, I'd say your post is smartassy enough that your wife now has grounds to lawfully hit you in the chops.
Posted by: Mark | May 25, 2006 at 12:16 PM
I regularly jaywalk.
I also may be committing criminal copyright violation every time I copy and attribute text on my blog. Although that's only if you believe the most aggressive proponents of owner's rights. :)
To amplify UA's comment, supra, I'm a plaintiffs' class action lawyer, which is not only offensive but a capital offense according to some members of the business community.
Posted by: Eh Nonymous | May 25, 2006 at 01:48 PM
I'm a trial lawyer, so guess that makes me worse than a petty criminal according to some.....
Posted by: Will | May 25, 2006 at 04:11 PM
I'm a tenant's side lawyer (in addition to my other hats). So as the landlords say, I'm stealing money from the mouth's of their [insert someone] and causing all ills of any given neighborhood.
Posted by: Bill | May 25, 2006 at 07:00 PM
First-year civil litigator here. While I stay in shape by working out regularly, I doubt I'd be able to take out your wife *and* kids if I ever decided to attack them in your home. Plus I'm in California. Really, we have nice enough places to rob on the beach, plus we don't have to put up with that nasty midwestern weather.
And aren't "people who read weblogs" really just like "people who watch television," only a titch more tech-savvy?
Posted by: The Law Fairy | May 25, 2006 at 07:04 PM
You have some nerve Evan. No one should announce to the world of unknown people when they're going to be out of town. I really doubt that criminals would "sign in." As far as your desire to meet up with people out of town, do you expect me to feel sorry for you? I don't. And, do criminals or "soon to be" criminals read weblogs, maybe not yours, but certainly they read some. I know of one extreme example, but I won't specify it because the gravity of the crime was such that I don't think that it would be respectful to the victims' families. It was a crime directly linked to the use of weblogs -- you should remember the crime. Oh, and I do think your post was smartassy. Love, Your Crazy Wife
Posted by: Evan's Crazy Wife | May 25, 2006 at 10:24 PM
Andrea: Don't worry, you're not crazy. And you have some good points. But didn't you notice that a few criminals did check in? Not any of the really bad ones, I'll admit, but at least a few plaintiffs' lawyers (or as we call them, "the competition.") Sure it's just a start, but I'm telling you, if we work together we can defeat the criminal element who's added Legal Underground to their RSS readers. On the other hand, I don't think we should do it by talking to each other in the comment section of this weblog, lest any criminally-minded readers get the idea that it's the most convenient way to talk because I'm out of town. I'll be downstairs in a few minutes and we can talk about it in person. If you notice that I'm walking funny--darting among the pieces of furniture in a crouch--that's only to avoid readers who might be looking in the windows. I'll be down in about five minutes. If you still love me, please have another pot of coffee ready. Love, Your Devoted Husband and Hard-Working Law Partner
Posted by: Evan | May 26, 2006 at 05:07 AM
Andrea, remember: You can't guarantee that you will pull a jury consisting entirely of wives.
Posted by: mythago | May 26, 2006 at 08:07 AM
Mythago: You think she might be thinking of offing me? Please don't encourage her--I was only teasing!
Posted by: Evan | May 26, 2006 at 12:50 PM
Don't be silly, Evan; juries can be called in for all sorts of cases.
Posted by: mythago | May 26, 2006 at 04:47 PM
I'm planning to hit your house next week. Not sure if I can fit it in on Wednesday; perhaps Thursday.
Posted by: GalloCruncher | May 26, 2006 at 06:01 PM
As a lawyer who represents individual plaintiffs in personal injury lawsuits, I believe I have already been identified as a terrorist. So while not your garden variety criminal, I am dangerous - at least according to Hank Greenberg.
But you can feel safe - the Administration has decided that Mr. Greenberg's statement constitutes sufficient cause to wiretap my phones and tail me daily. They'll let you know if I'm close, I bet.
Posted by: Matt | May 27, 2006 at 10:38 AM
Now that this thread has moved sufficiently down the page, I'll comment in the hope that no criminals actually see this. Evan, Andrea is right. It's just good personal security. Seriously.
Posted by: Marie | June 01, 2006 at 06:19 PM